R.I.P. Truth & Justice | Here lies the disappointment of the broken ones

In the world full of lies, truth is the revolutioner.
Lie is easy, truth is hard.
Truth is being pressed by lie.
Lie is so popular right now, that truth  ran away.
Finding such a truth is really hard.
Lie also cause justice to fell down.
Truth & justice do exist.
But hard to find.
So hard that many think that they're dead.
Killed by the lies.
Me?
I'm still searching for them.
For my sake,
And for the sake of others.
I'm tortured by the lies,
The pain,
The sorrow,
The sadness,
The loneliness.
I'm so torn.
I feel like I'm ready to die soon.
But I haven't found out why,
Why am I alive, with all these pain?
Maybe,
To find truth & justice is one of it.
Living, is definitely not easy.

Candle

There's a burning candle inside my heart.
The color?
Depends on my mood. But lately I don't even know what color it is.
However, the fire is too hot recently.
Even though it enlightens my heart, the fire is also burning my heart.
Will it turn my heart into ashes, or will it warm & enlighten my heart?
Will my candle be kind or dangerous?

Random Quote #1

The fact that you don't know what your future is may sound frightening.

However,

If you already know your future, there must be less adventures and less experiences in your life.

Without adventures,

Life would be boring.

Not all adventures are exciting, but take the lessons instead of pain and regret. Pain and regret bring you to sorrow, but lessons always make you a better person. If you feel like you've had enough of this life, trust God. You're here because of Him.

Rossie White / Khinanti Roro Sekarwangi

Hurt

I wanna run, but I'll get tired.
I wanna hide, but it won't solve anything.
I'm frustrated, but there's nothing much that I can do.
I'm torn, and I'm breaking down.
What should I do?
My life is messed up.
I wanna fight, but I'll get hurt.
Being in so much pain, it hurts a lot.
But giving up isn't my option.
To live is, though it already hurts.

I don't mind getting hurt.
But I do mind if I got hurt for no particular reason.
Getting hurt, is a part of living after all.
It's not like I wanna get used to the pain, why would I?
You can't avoid of being hurt.
It's like avoiding your own life.
Eventually, I have to face it.
Facing those things that make me suffer.
But I have no choice.
I'd rather die trying than die giving up.
The game of life, isn't always fair.

Time

Technically, time always go forward. But sometimes, or every time, time isn't equal for anyone although a day is still 24 hours for everyone. Why?

First, no one knows how much time we have until we die. Anyone can die at anytime. How does it sound to you, knowing that you have no idea how many times you have left?

Second, happy moments feel like it last shorter than sad moments. Have you ever experience it, or thinking about it? Imagine like you're chatting with your friends for half an hour but it might feel like just 10 or 15 minutes. However, something terrible which caused you pain that happened years ago, you still can feel it till now. You might think like,"I feel like it was just yesterday that.... happened, but it actually happened months/years ago."

Why is that happy moments last shorter while sad moments last longer? Happy moments make you "forget about time". When you do something that keeps you out of your boring statement like chatting, watching TV, going online, or listening to music, you have the drive to keep doing that so you might not care how long you've been doing that.

While sad moments always stuck in your memories. Although happy moments also stuck in your memories, but who wants to keep their sorrowful thoughts? You might feel like time goes fast around you, but there's something shielding you. You're the only one who feel like time always go slowly. You might also feel very empty, so empty that you feel like your soul isn't here.

So, that's my point of view about time. How does it sound to you?